Tooth

Tonight i was minding my own business, playing my guitar in my room when my niece walked in for a chat and a sing. She does that every so often. It’s brilliant. 

This week she’s had a wobbly tooth and she was eager to show it off, even though i’ve seen it. She told me she was a little worried about getting it out and asked me to tell her stories of when i had mine out.

I was a clinical kid when it came to my body. I had a high pain thresh hold and i wasn’t afraid to hurt myself, really. So stories of my teeth coming out were boring. “I just pulled them out when they got loose”. This did baffle her but she wasn’t interested.

“Have you got any other stories? About teeth, now.” Asked she.

Well, I know a boy that lost two teeth to a wham bar at a school disco. I also know a girl lost one to an apple. I know one boy who tied cord around his tooth and attached it to the door. When he slammed the door he lunged forward. It didn’t work, although when he ran away in disappointment, his aunty tugged the string and off came the tooth. I also know a boy who wouldn’t stop wiggling his loose tooth. His friends goaded him into letting us pull it out but he wouldn’t let us. He was so afraid of letting us have a go, upon leaving the room he opened the door into his face, which knocked out his tooth.

The less brief version of all these stories entertained my niece for twenty minutes. 

“I don’t like my tooth now because I haven’t eaten an apple for a week” She said.

When i was in primary school, four different boys, at different occasions asked me to pull out their teeth, and i did.

“Can you pull mine out? Will it hurt?”

Why, i thought you’d never ask! It’s been a while since i pulled out a pearl. I explained that it’d hurt a little but it will feel better when it was out.

Bless her, she trusted me. But not for long. It was itching to come out and i managed to loosen it by half it’s hinge. Then she got scared at the taste of blood.

She then sat between her parents who were very excited but anxious at the thought of the loss of their daughters first tooth. They also didn’t appreciate me brandishing a cork-screw and growling, like a pirate “Let’s get us a tooth!”. 

The trio of chickens sat there on the couch for an hour before deciding to go to bed. I cooked and eat my supper of steak (rare) and chips. They constantly ignored my request to finish the job. So i sent the family to bed and started to watch True Grit.

Within five minutes of leaving my niece stew, too scared to pull her tooth out, she called her mother who said. “Leave it alone or I cant believe im saying this let uncle Daf Pull it out. He won’t hurt you.” 

She came down stairs. I was excited. I washed my hands and contemplated grabbing the cork-screw for a final jape. I thought better of it and got straight to the job. Within four seconds her tooth was out. Courtesy of her top uncle. Me.

She’s looking forward to having her tooth fairy money, now. “I’ll pull my own out next time. It wasn’t really that bad!” She said in excitement. Im very proud. And relieved. The whole house is.

And that was my sunday night. :)