It terrifies and excites me.

I just had the news that i may have to perform a comedy gig on my own!

I always planned on doing one this year but never got round to it. But now, I may HAVE to do one on friday. I got the news forty five minutes ago at 2:10am and i know im not going to sleep tonight. Im currently (blogging aside) bullet pointing all my ideas and wanting to try them out, knowing i cant as most of them are musical.

I’ll be honest, im excited. November has hit me with a few pleasant surprises and im counting this as another one. Obviously i would rather do the gig along side at least one of my trusted comedy genius friends. It may even turn out that way. But in my head; Right now, Im performing alone and it terrifies and excites me.

Whatever happens i know i’ll enjoy the night. I get to see some old friends and dance along to a band fronted by an old school friend. I also know there’ll be some support for me so if im not funny they’ll do some extra hard laughing to make me feel better.

I know that i will do at least one funny thing. I hope.

More importantly, i get to show off on guitar. Im more comfortable standing behind one of them. That should make me look like less of a victim in front of the audience. On a strange note, im going to tune my guitar to D,A,D,G,A,D, for the heck of it.

Anyway, no more insecure nonsense. Continue to provide yourself with ideas, Daf. Make them good ones.

Tonight's final thought.

The rain outside is silent. It looks quite heavy; like typical drizzle. My favorite fall of rain. And yet, there's no noise from my window alerting me to it.
I've lived in this country all my life. It rains often and i enjoy it. Cleansing and familiar. I love listening to it, walking in it, the wooden smell it sometimes brings. It's never rained without me knowing about it straight away. There are many things to hear when it comes.

• Slapping against your window,
• Trickling down a drain
• You can't bump into a person who doesn't complain about it.

But under the hum of my laptop, i was oblivious to it until just now. So now im putting this machine away, opening my window and letting the tap, tap, tap of rain lull me to sleep.
Goodnight.

A two step guide to quick inspiration

If you ever need inspiration, here’s what to do:

1. Do nothing all day.
2. Try to sleep.

Side effects may include:

• Tiredness
• Mood swings
• Diminishing patience
• Caffeine addiction
• Cocaine addiction
• Insomnia

This guide may not work for you if you are a normal person.

Things to do while you're waiting for a casserole to cook...

1. Nap.
2. Read.
3. Play guitar.
4. Build a robot.
5. Do fifty million press-ups.
6. Get naked.
7. Stay Naked.
8. Ironing.
9. Improvised indoor golf.
10. Use every post it note you have to label each muscle on your body.
11. Sit in front of the oven to watch your casserole while your arse gets cold.
12. Dig out the novelty pair of clogs to walk in and sound like a horse. (Whilst naked)
13. Do a big art attack.
14. Ponder.
15. Sculpting.
16. Pose.
17. Do the safety dance.
18. Sing a little song. Many times.
19. NAKED STAR JUMPS! (Be careful. No slippery floors)
20. Tell the internet.

That coppery smell...

For the past couple of days i’ve picked up my old songbook and played/sang all the songs i’ve written in the past year and a half. There’s not as much as there should be in there but im proud of each composition.

I’d almost forgotten the fun i made out of struggling to find the right words. Singing strong melodies with stupid words in order to make it work. 

Singing them all again has given me a gentle smack in the face for forgetting to write songs out of genuine pleasure. The last 3 songs i’ve written were for a part of a project. Im going to do it more, now. Write songs for the sake of writing songs. To show off, to struggle, to cheer myself, to use my time in a way that’s beneficial to me (even if it’s just on a personal level).

Plus I love the coppery smell on my fingertips after playing my guitar flat-out for an hour. 

Contagious happiness.

Yesterday evening i was driving to a friends house. It’s a 40 minute drive so tidy music is helpful. I only have a tape deck at the moment. The two tapes i have are 33 classical hits and The soundtrack to 80’s hit american TV show; Kung fu: The legend continues.

As brill as these tapes are, i’ve played them to death.

So the only option now is for the radio to be on it’s game. I’ll usually go for radio 2 because i am one cultured son of a gun, however, it’s signal died on this journey.

So i started violently channel switching in order to find something suitable. I was in a queue that was looking at some red traffic lights. All of a sudden one of the stations started playing “Moves like Jagger” By Maroon 5. 

A lightning bolt of DANCE struck me. I had the moves like Jagger i think. Or someone young and good at dancing. 

In my satisfied trance i looked out my windows and the car to my left, filled with ladies (well, three of them) were watching me, laughing. As they should. 

I did the only thing i knew to do. SING. At them. They laughed even harder and joined in with the dancing.

And then the light’s turned green and i drove away feeling that the world was ultimately good.

Last night's show

The one i’d been stressing about for about two and a half weeks. ACRE comedy's live show about science! Oh yes.

We performed it last night. It went very well if i do say so myself. My friends are very funny and it came across on stage. I started lacking confidence which is usually the case but it grew through the night. By the end of the first half I had my confidence. Bering on stage with someone else is easier to handle. Also, i got to play my guitar which im better at compared to remembering lines.

Second half came and i started to ride my confidence well. It was an audience participation bit which my friend was managing while i played a little sting and guided the audience, telling them when to “ooh” and “aah”. The participant on stage was, honestly, amazing. Seeing him be such a good sport give me that little extra inspiration. 

We started flowing properly. Faster than we were used to and it felt good. In fact the flow gained so much momentum, my fellow performer, after being introduced by myself, came on as a baffled character. He followed his stage directions (which were to fall over and lose his papers) with such gusto that he landed on his face and lost half a tooth.

We found it, though. It was in his lip.

We wanted to rush it from there but the tooth-lost performer improvised some standup about the missing half-tooth which stalled us for about 10 minutes. We buzzed through our bits after getting him off stage, cleaned him up and, fair play, he came on for the last sketch and danced to the song. (The song was my favorite bit because i wrote it :)

The audience were very polite and i believe that they were definitely entertained.

So instead of drinking and relaxing after the gig, I drove my friend to A&E where i chatted to people in the waiting room. After the doctor told him what he already knew, we got some pain killers and drove home.

The thing i learned is this. You can stress and over prepare for anything and everything. But if a friend looses a tooth during a stage performance it will literally MAKE the night. All you have to be able to do is react well to any situation and things will go well.